Todnem.com (beta)

Exactly when he came into my life, I don't know, but he was an integral part of me for a long time.  He wasn't very big, but turned out to be one of the best things that ever happened to me. 

Because of him I had people I know at work and elsewhere coming out of the woodwork with hugs and prayers and expressed good wishes.  A young nurse at work to whom we gave money when her husband was seriously injured, who has young kids and is facing her second thyroid cancer surgery, gave me a check for $100 to "help our family."  I didn't have the heart not to take it. 

Because of him I got off my butt and started moving again after months of being stalled out.

Because of him I may have an excuse to retire.

Because of him I realized how much more negative I was than I had thought.

Because of him we will once again reorder our priorities and increase life over work.

After all he did for me, it almost seems a shame I had to kill him, but his benefits would ultimately have turned to liabilities.  I'm thankful that he's gone, but I'm also grateful for his message.  May he rest in peace.

His former host

Trailerman is gone!!! We went to the nursing home the other day with a hold harmless agreement for us to move the trailer and a declaration of abandoned property if he refused to sign, but he wasn't there.  Apparently when he heard that Mom and I had been there, he decided we were serious and he called Mom promising to move the trailer this weekend.  Yeah, right.  And Monday morning there it was still in all its glory.  But Monday afternoon, Mom went by and it was gone and we didn't have to spend another cent on it.  Never mess with the Dragon Lady.

Don't really remember who I've told what i.e. my memory isn't any better than normal, but I saw the specialist and he pronounced I have a meningioma rather than an acoustic neuroma.  Same general situation although no direct cranial nerve involvement so far so that's probably better news.  So now I just have to get rid of the damn thing in the next 6 months.  (The next MRI is going to say tumor? What tumor?)  I've called  a recommended naturopath (but have'nt got hold of him yet), started positive visualization, and upped my tumeric to three times a day.  That little sucker is withering even as I write.

My eye improved significantly the first week or so, but now seems to be on a plateau.  The Dr. says whatever function I have in 6 months is what I'll end up with.  (So the 6 month mark is going to be time for a real celebration.)  Apparently, Hawaiian Airlines currently has a $350 round trip per person fare, and there is an inter-island fare war which has seen fares as low as $5 between islands.  Obviously, this has dropped in our laps, so who are we to argue?  Don't know whether we'll go now or in 6 months.

The Fed lowered interest rates today and the market roared back.  They'll undoubtedly try to have it cooking by election time, so we intend to cash in on it.  Homeland Security is due to walk the Bean Rd. property on 9/25.  There are at least 8 others they're also looking at (I'm sure these properties are all almost certainly inferior) but at least from the description of their needs in the newspaper, it sure sounds like we're ideal.  

I'm going to be on the contract negotiating team at the hospital which starts in Oct.  Per Diems get a 15% premium in lieu of benefits and have, nationally, for years.  Trouble is, the current benefits package is worth 39.6% according to the info I found.  I'm going to insist on equal compensation for equal work, and they aren't going to want to set a precedent, but hey, somebody has to go first.

After that, I'm quite likely going to retire, so the universe better start coughing up income.

Dave

Well, the MRI results are in and as I expected, there is no sign of any plaques or other signs of MS.  Good news.  But they don't know what I have --if it gets better they'll declare optic neuritis, if it gets worse, they'll declare ischemic neuritis.  In either case there is no treatment (why did I spend all that money again?)  If it stays the same (a distinct possibility) I assume they'll never know what it is, what caused it, etc.  No news.

Before anyone gets carried away with rejoicing, however, there was one incidental finding the doctor mentioned in an "Oh, by the way" fashion.  I have a tumor -- completely unrelated to my eyes.  It's called an acoustic neuroma, and it grows from the inner ear canal into the brain.  It initially affects cranial nerves VII and VIII which lead to hearing, balance and facial paralysis problems.  It is considered benign, but since it will eventually put enough pressure on the brain stem to kill you, I wonder about the definition of benign.  It is operable, and may well be so small at this point that they simply observe for a while.  I'll have to see a specialist and come up with a plan.

If you want to find out more about acoustic neuroma, there's a good website you can google.  I'm still a little dazed but words describing the surgery and after-effects like: significantly reduced mortality, icu, total deafness, lack of balance, drooling, swallowing problems, facial paralysis, 6-8 week recovery with significant weakness, leaking cerebralspinal fluid, meningitis -- these do nothing for my desire to add this to my list of things to do.

If they go through the ear, it's total deafness forever and dizziness and vertigo for  a long time.  (And it's the right side --my "better ear")  On the other hand going through my skull doesn't really turn me on either.  Hell, at this rate, I'll be deaf and blind and I'm already dumb.

The eye thing was initially alarming and quickly became annoying.  Perhaps this will follow suit, but at the moment I gotta say I'm scared.  I guess the good thing is because of the eye thing, we've discovered the tumor before there were any symptoms and the smaller the tumor the more likely a good outcome from surgery. (I hope)  Actually, I'm beginning to get damn mad at the experts and their limited options.  In the poker game of life, I want new cards.

Only one thing to do at a time like this -- make a bananna split.

Dave 

When our forefathers set this country up, their concern was for justice for all.  The law was for the People's sake, a tool by which to achieve justice.  Fair, right, and just were the goals.

In the intervening years, the lawyers of this country have subverted and perverted the original intent to where fair, right, and just have become irrelevant terms.  The law is now for its own sake, and the only criteria remaining is: Is an action legally permissible?  NOT is it morally, ethically, philosophically defensible.

In discussing the Bean Rd. situation with my sister the other day, I asked her flat out whether she would prefer a system of law or a system of justice.  Sadly (to me) but not surprisingly (she tends to be My Establishment, Right or Wrong) she chose a system of law.  Since the country as a whole seems to have chosen likewise even if by default, it occurs to me that perhaps I am the minority wacko.  So here's my question for all of you -- which would you prefer as your top priority, law or justice?  It would seem to me that if you vote for law, then you have to uphold and support whatever laws they pass.  Forced inoculations; required fluoridation;  mandated helmets, seat belts, dark glasses, long underwear, and anything else they want; seizure of private property as it suits them; suspension of all rights civil or legal for any group deemed undesirable; any taxes or fees they care to levy, etc. ad nauseum.

All of which seem to be okay except with a few of us wackos.  So please vote.  No need to defend, excuse, or apologize for your choices either way.  As someone outside the U.S., I'd be especially interested in Kjetil's viewpoint.

Dave